It is quite hard to focus on recovering when you are questioning yourself about what went wrong. For some of us, it feels like we have to start over, and for others, it may be easier to move on. There isn’t one set way on how to heal a broken heart. But there are actions you can take to ensure you come out on top. One of the best things I learned in my life was to always focus on myself first, even in a relationship. This came after having to start over many times after a relationship ended.
I hope this not only helps but also inspires you to remember that, with or without someone, the most important relationship we have in this life is with ourselves. Don’t forget you in the process of your heartache — you are the most important person to remember through this. Whether you made a big mistake in the relationship or not, this time right now is about ensuring well-being is priority.
The science behind a broken heart
Heartbreaks are painful, but with some guidance and self-motivation, you can channel the pain you may be experiencing into a healing process. It is up to you to make the decision, but know that you are never alone in your journey.
How to heal a broken heart gently
To heal a broken heart, it maybe difficult at first, but gradually you will get better with these steps:
1. Make a choice: either run from the pain or deal with it.
Hopefully, you want to deal with it and not distract yourself by other means (i.e. overworking, substance abuse, jumping into another relationship, being so busy you can’t think). Rise up to the challenge and deal with it head-on. This will allow you to be free of the pain in the time it takes rather than lingering on it forever.
2. Leave no room for guilt in your life going forward.
If you made a mistake then, by all means feel the guilt for the moment.
You may want to extend your apologies depending on the situation. But ongoing guilt is a killer. Get rid of it.
3. Don’t be hard on yourself in the process of healing.
Feel your emotions and acknowledge them. Suppressing what you feel is robotic and is sure to come out in another way.
It is awkward and uncomfortable but going through the motions allows you to feel like a human being. It is normal. Don’t be embarrassed for feeling the way you do.
4. Lose yourself in what you’re passionate about.
Talk, write, sing, dance, draw and create–if you have a passion that you lose yourself in, then use it to help you heal. Music and writing is my healthy escape and I can express myself through a journal without judgment from anyone. It gets my thoughts and feelings out. I end up creating some great pieces too!
5. Feel good and the bad in each and every day.
Our mindsets can either help us to go forward or keep us in a state of fear, sadness and regret. It’s very easy to remain hurt and angry, but that won’t help us personally. Take each day as it comes and choose the attitude that will uplift you.
Leave a Reply