Find healthy ways to soothe your emotional pain. It may be your first instinct to want to ignore or dull your pain by turning to alcohol, drugs, or food, but these will not provide long-term solutions. Steer clear of these unhealthy methods of dealing with your emotional pain. Instead, try to find ways of dealing with your emotions that will lead to growth and recovery.
Try taking up a new hobby to keep yourself occupied while you recover from a breakup. Take a class, join a club, or teach yourself how to do something. Engaging in a hobby will help you to feel better about yourself, distract you from your pain for a little while, and build up your self-esteem by helping you to develop a new skill.
Consider talking to a therapist if the pain becomes too great. Many people are able to recover from a breakup on their own, but this is not possible for everyone. If you are having trouble coping with your emotional pain or if you think you might be depressed as a result of the breakup, get help from a mental health professional as soon as possible.
Reflect on your relationship. Consider all of the reasons that you and your ex broke up. Try to keep in mind that even if that you enjoyed being together for a while, something was not working. Thinking about the reasons why the relationship ended can help you understand why you need to move on. You may also be able to avoid making the same mistakes in the future if you can identify areas where you contributed to the demise of the relationship. Ask yourself some of the following questions.
- Did I contribute to the end of the relationship? If so, what did I do?
- Do I tend to choose the same sort of people to date? If so, what are they like? Are they good for me? Why or why not?
- Have I had similar problems in other relationships? If so, what is causing me to have these problems? What can I do differently in future relationships?
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